Friday, April 14, 2017

Why am I so domestically challenged?

My mother made Paige and myself a cookbook several years ago for Christmas that had to have taken her hours and hours to put together. It was by far the most thoughtful gift anyone has ever given me. It was full of all of her recipes that Paige and I request for her to make on holidays. Paige got the baking gift but it skipped directly over me. In the back of this precious book, my mother made a "Google Mom" page with all the ridiculous questions I call and ask her complete with thorough and sometimes sarcastic answers. Yes one of those does in fact read "How do you boil an egg?"

It isn't just her that I annoy either. I had to call my friend Brandy from Kroger one day because I had the genius idea to make cornbread for the first time, found a list of ingredients online, and couldn't find the first one in the store. I think I may have called her 5 times before I left the store. Flour comes in more than just the color white? This item pictured almost sent me into a full fledge 2 year old toddler meltdown. I couldn't find it anywhere and had walked all over it a million times.

Today from inside Dollar General, I had to ask my friend Jessica where the Baking Soda was because I couldn't find it either. I'm not even going to mention that I was looking for it beside the household cleaner because the only time I really recall using it was once when I had a grease fire on the stove and I somehow knew to throw Baking Soda on it.  I'm a special kind of special. You get the picture right.

My friend Ashley loves to tell me about these amazing dishes she cooks and I am tempted to look at her and say "Well let me tell you about this superb dish I cooked the other night that came straight from Hamburger Helper that was DIVINE!" Jason requests this gourmet dish at least once a week.

And this one....

So how did this amount of ignorance come from such a wonderful mother who's Chicken and Dumplings will put ANY of yours to shame? I live with a house full of picky eaters that's why! Their inability to eat anything that isn't a hamburger or cooked from a box has made me domestically challenged. One day I decided enough was enough and I decided it was time for a change. I tried 3 weeks of cooking from Pinterest and cookbooks, hence the cornbread fiasco. I broke out my crock pot, blew the dust off and put it to work. One night Jason walked in with a Dominoes Pizza because he had waved his white flag. Out of the 20 meals I cooked, only 4 were eaten by all three of us. They were the most basic 4 meals out of all the others. I cried defeat and went back to business as usual.

So Paige, moms legacy will fall upon your shoulders. I am glad Ross will eat pretty much anything you put in front of him. Count that as a blessing sweet sister. When we are old and you are cooking the holiday meals, know that I am good for the Rolls and Sweet Tea.

On a side note, my cornbread turned out awesome. It was the first and last time my iron skillet has ever been used.

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