That one time we made slime....

I've never done a "How To" blog, that's really not my scene, so today I'm gonna add my own "Real mom" step by step take on a semi-fun, really messy, wish they would have done it with grandma at her house craft that I just had to clean up.

The kid wants to make slime. He's been begging for months and I've been putting it off for months hoping he would forget about it. Now before you criticize me, I'm all about making memories with my kid but something about working with glue and food coloring has BAD IDEA written ALL over it. So what happened instead to change my mind you ask? My mother. That's what. He asked NANA to buy him the stuff to make it so she did and sent it home with ME. So here we are on a Saturday, the week AFTER VBS I might add, making slime. So here is a step by step guide on how to make this ooey gooey glob of nastiness. 

Step 1

Say a quick prayer over these items... lay hands if you must. 

Step 2

Pour 1/4 of a perfectly good jar of Elmers glue into a bowl that you don't ever care to use again. 

Step 3

Pour 1/4 cup of warm water into glue mixture. Side note: Make sure you feel the water first to make sure it's warm and not scalding hot before your kid throws the measuring cup across the room screaming that his hand is melting...

Step 4

Add food coloring of your choice. Don't ask me how many squirts, just wing it. 

Step 5

Add 3 heaping (that means overflowing to the point you have to stop and clean after this step because it looks like sugar exploded on your counter) tbsp of Borax. 

Step 6

Find a utensil you never want to use again to stir this nonsense up. I chose a skewer stick. At this point with the red we realized that it was in fact a fourth of a cup and not 1 1/4 of a cup of water so we had to start all over

Step 7

Make your kid pick up the mixture and knead it until, well, it turns into slime. You will hear a lot of "this is gross" and "can you please just do it" at this point and that's when you say "this was your idea kid!" 

Step I've lost count

You start ALL over with a new color 😫😫

Your almost done step

Spend 10 minutes washing their hands with baking soda because they will look like permanent skittles. 

Your almost done step

Put nastiness into individual zip lock bags and mash away! 

Step your done

Put slime in refrigerator below the Little Ceasers pizza that has been there for almost two weeks and let it sit there until it grows mold and you remember to throw it away because your kid has moved on to something new and forgot it was ever even in there until you actually DO throw it away and they have a melt down because "They weren't done playing with it" three months later. Did you read that huge long run on sentence in one breath?

✔️ memory made, documented and hopefully never to be repeated again. Now to think how to get my mother back.