Wednesday, February 24, 2016

Two prayers....

My dearest Colby,
        From the day I found out that I was pregnant with you, I started praying daily for two things. No it wasn't your health, your looks, your IQ or your abilities. What I prayed for was far greater a concern for me than anything else. The first thing I prayed for was your salvation, and that your love for Jesus would take the first priority always in your life. The second thing I prayed for was the salvation of your future wife. On your wedding day, she will know that before the time you were even born, she has received just as many prayers on my behalf as you have. 
        Tonight, your daddy and I along with Bro. Jerry witnessed my first prayer come true. For over a year now, our nightly prayer time together has been filled with questions about how to be saved and with persistence you have asked to take that step. For fear of your age and comprehension of what you were truly doing, I would tell you that we would know when the time was right. For the last two months you took it upon yourself to prove to me that you were truly ready and your initiative eased my troubled heart that it was finally time. Tonight, with the heart, faith, obedience and innocence of a child, you humbly sat before the throne of Jesus and asked Him to be the Lord of your life. You were nervous to the point you had a hard time being still, but when you were done you looked at me and smiled a smile of relief, happiness and excitement. With tears rolling down my cheeks I smiled back at you with a burden lifted in my heart because now I know we have eternity together. There is nothing in life that will ever compare to that moment shared together. I will never be more proud of you than I was tonight. You will fail, daily, but the grace of God will cover you. The Holy Spirit will be your guide in life and His wisdom will always outweigh your own. You will cling to that prayer in times of happiness, in times of sorrow, in times of change and in times of weakness. You may have times in your life where you will look at your sin and doubt yourself. You will find peace in your confidence of your salvation. 

        So tonight as I lay down I start a new prayer to replace the one that was answered. I will pray for myself. I will pray that I will be what you need. I pray that I will make it my first priority to help you grow in your faith and never go slack. I will pray for God to open doors for teachable moments and allow me to always look for opportunities to show you Gods kindness, mercy, discipline, and grace. I will pray for wisdom and guidance as I lead you and set the example for you in which to follow. I pray I will live up to Gods standards that you will not settle for less in your future wife. I just pray for Gods anointing grace to be the best Godly mother to you that I can be. You deserve that of me. 

        Two repetitive prayers will still take place each and everyday with me, although one will change tonight. I love you more than you will ever comprehend. 



Thursday, February 18, 2016

You know you have done it.....

As moms, we like to judge how well of a parenting job we are doing by comparing ourselves to other moms, which is utterly ridiculous. I don't know why we feel the need to compulsively do this to ourselves, but nevertheless we do. So I am here today to make you either feel better about yourself or breathe a sigh of relief that you aren't the only one who does these things.



12 Things I have done as a mom:


1) I throw his artwork away. This one is tricky because you have to really use your thinking skills. Not only do you have to make sure that they aren't looking, you have to dig to the bottom of the garbage to deposit it then make sure to cover it up really well with the top garbage. Then if your trash bag is clear, you have to make sure the lovely piece of artwork is in the middle of the bag so that you can't see it once you take the bag out of the garbage. If you miss any of these steps, you get a full fledge SHAMING from your child for throwing their priceless artwork away. I'm not the mom with the filing cabinet where I alphabetize all of his coloring pages, Sunday school crafts, school work etc. I have a box I keep things that are sentimental to me, and the rest gets stashed in the trash.


2) Borrowed money from him without asking.  One day I had a hankering for a slush from Sonic. I went at happy hour, ordered my slush and my total was a little over a dollar. I dug for change and came up with nothing. I refused to use my debit card for that small of an amount. His wallet peered out from under the console. He bought me a slush that day. With nerds. He was none the wiser.


3) Find his random stuff in my purse. Just this week while fishing for my wallet, I found 2 nerf bullets. I once found a tiny dinosaur of his in my purse that I took out and stuck on my desk. That was almost 6 years ago. He still stares at me to this day.




4) I have finished his homework before. Ok after you finish gasping over there, I will add that he was watching me and we were doing it together, but nonetheless he was taking forever and it was just easier for me to finish circling the answers. 3rd grade is no joke people. Weekly I have to google his homework first to even help him.  This is why God didn't call me to be a school teacher. If we pass the 3rd grade without killing one another, we deserve a big vacation.


5) Closet eat their snacks. Jason and I secretly get excited when he has had a holiday party at school. As soon as his cheeks hit the bathtub, we are going through that loot pulling out the good stuff. God bless the mom who gives the Reese's  Christmas Trees, hearts and eggs. We thank you.


6) Blamed them for something you did. I don't know what happened to your last nutty buddy.... Colby must have ate it. There is no shame in my game.


7) Made them bring you something you could have gotten yourself. I have no issues pulling this little hat out of my bag based on the amount of times a day I hear the words "Momma can you get me ________?"  Touché kid, touché.


8) Play with his toys in the tub. WWE wrestlers have taken over my tub. They line the walls, their paraphernalia liter the floor and before you know it you are soaking in a hot tub of water putting Roman Reigns boots back on him. You might actually bounce him around the water a time or two before putting him back where he belongs. If he happens to get in a fight with one of the other figures on his way back to the wall, well it just had to be done.




9)  Pull the "Because I told you so card" that you used to hate to hear as a kid. Sometimes an explanation just takes too long and you just need something done.  I hate the words as soon as they come out of my mouth, but sometimes you play the cards you have.


10) Lose a toy...... on purpose. From the annoying McDonalds happy meal toy to the recorder your mom thought would be such a fun gift for your kid, they all find the trashcan at my house when he isn't home. This isn't something I am brave enough to do when he is actually still in the house.


11) Use my kid as an excuse to get out of something I don't want to do. I'm just going to leave that one sitting right there. Just know it happens.


12) Tell them a bold face liar liar pants on fire fib. It seems the stores he always wants to go too are magically closed for that day or I am entirely too broke to go play the .25 games at Chuck E Cheese, but I can sure go spend $12 on us some ice cream from 32 degrees.


So there ya have it. My dirtiest parenting deeds laid out for you. So either give yourself a pat on the back and decide that maybe you are a better parent than you originally thought, or laugh with me at the things we do just to survive this thing called parenting. The good news is, there is zero reasons you should feel guilty. You were once a kid too and its just the circle of life.